Rest In Peace Dad

 My lovely Dad died at 8:30 am yesterday morning.  I spoke with him on Sunday and he was his usually chirpy self saying that he was sure he would be home by the end of the week and would enjoy reading the blog from his phone in the hospital.  Sadly on Monday he had another heart episode, which necessitated sedation and shock treatment and due to the sudden collapse he also bashed his head quite badly.  A CT scan showed a fracture on the skull with an accompanying small bleed on the brain.  Due to the uncertainty of his condition my brother Col and I were allowed to be with him.  I arrived at the hospital at 8pm Monday evening as Col had arrived a few hours before me.  A priest was called and Dad was given the Sacrament of The Sick.  Since he was fairly peaceful due to the sedative Col and I returned to Mum and Dad's house at 11pm only to be woken by a telelphone call from the hospital at 1am.

It was a long night and Dad's heart and oxygen rate kept dipping and then he seemed to rally but as the night turned into day his heart became really irregular and we knew it wouldn't be long.  Just before he died the sedation had worn off slightly -enough for him to open his eyes and recognise we were with him and that was a real comfort.  Col and I had prayed with him and for him during the night and at the very end we were able to encourage him to make that step in to eternity - a very painful and humbling priviledge.  

Dad it hurts not to have you here and you have left a massive hole, may you rest in peace, San xx 

Last Week

Another school year and a ...

... not back to school silly car selfie and our first coffee stop since March.  We dropped off some items for Dave and our usual route home was blocked so we made it home via the motorway and a pitstop at Costa as a treat.

Elderberry Foraging

On Friday we went foraging for elderberries with Nanna.  Not only were they thin on the ground but small in size probably due to a combination of a very dry spring and a poor summer.  With a bit of luck we might manage to make one jar of elderberry syrup from our meagre pickings.

Crochet

I finished the blanket for my customer and she promptly placed an order for another one, this time in blue.  I have all the necessary colours which left over from the coast colourway bunting so I cast on immediately and have made good progress.

Hospital Number Three

My lovely dad was admitted to the High Dependency Unit late on Friday night. It was a grace of God that my brother and his wife were staying for the weekend as he had to administer CPR whilst waiting for the ambulance.  At one point there was some concern regarding a stroke but thankfully the CT scan was clear.  I spoke with Dad's nurse yesterday morning for a progress report and once Dad had his phone dropped of yesterday afternoon, I had a quick chat with him at the tea time.  The cardiologist in the local hospital will be speaking with Dad's cardiologist at Blackpool at some point today.  He does have heart failure but with careful monitoring and a possible change in medication he should hopefully be home later this week. 

 I will not lie, I had a jolly good cry yesterday morning whilst watching online mass.  I think the whole situation with Dave, trying to support the kids, my own health and concern for my parents just got on top of me. God is a very good listener and so He listened whilst I blubbered!!  I do miss mass too and I'm trying to find a way to attend, I think I'll speak with Fr Geoffrey our priest about the best day to visit. 

Update

 Dave was transferred to the Sue Ryder Neurological Rehab Centre a week today.  Pip and I were allowed to see him the day before his transfer as we were unsure whether we would be allowed to visit at the new place.  We can visit once his seven day quarantine is over which ends to today providing his second Covid test is clear.

He has settled in well and has a lovely ground floor room with an en suite bathroom. All the staff are not only very competent but very caring and at least four of the clinical support workers are Catholic/Orthodox so contact has been made with the local Parish Priest regarding Holy Communion.  Dave is now thankfully on the correct diet as a result of a visit from the dietician and head chef; not only is the food nourishing it is well presented and appetising. Most importantly of all however Dave is now accessing intensive physio rehab five times a week with additional occupational therapy support of at least twice a week.

The kids and I are bumbling along.  I won't lie my health is pretty rubbish right now and I'm using disability aids in the home and outside to help me get about.  Ben is majorly stressed about a return to college, (we have this every single year but this time it is much worse as a result of Covid)  and activities that Pip would normally attend, are either not running or it is tricky to access due to my own health inadequacies.

 My lovely friend Eva wrote a thorough and detailed list of a home school plan and I had intended to put the suggestions in place over the summer break.  Well that old saying "If you want to hear God laugh tell him your plans" certainly heled true this year!  I have however signed Pip up for a Year 7 English class courtesy of Oxford Home Learning so at least we have Maths and English sorted. Little by little we'll get there :-)

First time seeing Dad in five weeks

A room not only with a view but a place ...

... to dine al fresco!

Wildflower meadow on the estate :-)

Sarah who took Dave for a tour around the grounds yesterday :-)

   

Sunday Smiles Before The Storm

 

It was a Mum and Son weekend.

 Pip stayed with Sara, Tom and Oliver and Ben and I hung out together.  It was meant to be a quiet weekend but in the end we had two lots of garden visitors at various times on the Saturday afternoon, with rest breaks in between.  Living with a chronic illness and one that is in a significant flare is always tricky when it comes to socialising.  I find sustained conversation when I am this unwell very exhausting and in turn it exacerbates all the horrid physical symptoms. However I am  mindful that Ben and Pip need bright spots in their day and so  I said yes to the visitors knowing there would be a pay back at some point.

This morning I dropped off some items for Dave en route to having lunch with ST and Ollie and I made the mahoosive mistake of not taking the lift and using the stairs 😓  By the time I reached his ward I couldn't walk in a straight line and the muscle tremors had kicked in, oh dear.  There was no sign indicating that visitors were not allowed and a nurse even let me through the doors but I was met by a staff nurse who wouldn't even let me wave at Dave from the corridor.  I know they are doing their job but I must admit I was sad.

Sara made a really lovely lunch but the visit was marred by my feeling very poorly.  In fact I even forgot to take pictures of the visit which was a shame as I know Dave would have loved to see how they were all doing, ah well that's life.

Once home I staggered upstairs and crashed on the bed and that was me for the remainder of the afternoon (I've spared you the photo of me looking ghastly!)  Pip occupied herself downstairs and Ben took charge of the tea, thank God.  I had a very tired WhatsApp chat with Dave after tea and he has finally recognised that he needs a transfer to the neurological rehab centre in Preston.  He is currently on a geriatric rehab ward and a significant number of the patients have dementia.  Consequently he was disturbed during the night with staff dealing with folk going walkabout and looked quite dispirited this evening.

We are spending part of this forthcoming week in Cumbria visiting family, the kids and I need a break and my Dad is hoping I'll trim his hair, poor guy must be really desperate!  So tomorrow and Tuesday are home days packing and tidying and with a bit of luck Dave should be transferred to rehab before we leave on Wednesday.

August Snapshots

The man himself complete with ...

... a hospital beard and  an array of not terribly appetising food that is also causing an allergic reaction, so a visit from the dietitian is booked for next week. 

A specially commissioned Pip doodle for a 'dauntless dad'

 Never trust a man wit' beard, that can also hack your Sainsbury's food account and add a posy of Freesias to the shop 😜

Ollie let loose with the hose pipe, watch out mummy!

Mary following in her mum's footsteps and  climbing The Hoad Monument in Ulverston.

Keeping busy, cleaning the secateurs.

Trying out the latest bit of gardening gear, ideal for when working at the church using the strimmer and ride on mower.

Pip enjoying a much needed sleepover with her best buddy and yay the sun was shining that day!

Me having a much needed crash on the floor, currently dealing with a ME/Fibromyalgia/Glandular Fever flare at the moment, which is not surprising!  Thankful for a slew of herbal medicine and supplements and although it is horribly manageable it really could be a lot worse 😉

Happy Saturday x 

The Etac Turner

Dave has been using one of these aids as a standing device which was also instrumental in assisting Kate Davies recover from a stroke in 2010, she shares her enthusiasm for this piece of canny equipment in the following YouTube video:

 

Saturday Work

It was a very productive day at number sixteen: I worked through my job list which included cleaning the bathrooms and checking off the newly arrived bank statement, I'm quite pleased with my finance progress and it is coming together nicely.  Pip made one of her epic doodles for Dave to provide some much needed colour in his day, Ben made a yummy melt in the mouth tart for tea as well as helping Mum prune the plum tree (that has yet to fruit), so all in all a good day.

Courgette, Leek and Cheese Tart

Outside card gaming

Tucking in

I tried every which way with exposure compensation but had real trouble with setting the lighting on the camera and yes, that is another steep learning curve!  I have finally to take as many photographs as I can using my lovely camera that Dave bought for my 50th so with a bit of luck and practice things should improve!

Beautiful bouquet from our lovely friends that visited on Friday, it was strange and sad not to hug goodbye but that's life at the moment :-)

Frazzled :-)

Firstly an update:  an MRI scan has shown that Dave has three hairline fractures in his sacrum which also indicates onset of osteoporosis, which is not uncommon in MS patients who are no longer fully mobile.

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My brain has turned to mush and there are moments in the day when I just cannot think straight.  However I have got to grips with the online banking, excel spread sheet and have made a revised budget, so go me!

As the days drag on the kids are struggling and yet despite that they are trying their best and sometimes we even manage to laugh at something funny.

I am not convinced that Dave is in the best place for his care.  It has taken the nursing staff virtually all week to time his morphine dose half an hour before the physios arrive and today they got it right but the physios did not turn up!  As a result he had been given a double dose of morphine that was not necessary :-( He will have no physio visits over the weekend so the next time he is given the opportunity to stand will be Monday, two weeks after the accident.  He managed to stand with a special frame yesterday for two minutes.

 I am really grateful for our NHS and appreciate that folk are working under extremely difficult circumstances but even so the lines of communication are poor. With this in mind it might mean the best place for him is in fact the Neuro rehab facility in Preston which is the same travel time from here to the current hospital, Lancaster. 

I'm really grateful for mum being here and as I type she is enjoying herself pottering in the garden, thank goodness someone is keeping the plants alive!  I'd hate for Dave to come home to a desert!!

Well I shall sign off, I have some friends popping over for a socially distanced chat and cup of tea in the garden.  Thanks to Dave's organising skills mum and I have Gardener's World to look forward to once the kids are in bed.

Thanks for reading and caring xx 

Sunday Ramblings

First of all an update regarding Dave - the CT scan detected a small fracture in the spine and his report was sent to the neurological surgical team for advice; there was a concern that there was compression on the nerves in the spinal cord.  Orthopaedics also checked the images and both teams were satisfied that the injury was not likely to cause any further damage to his spine.  As a result the physio team have been given the go ahead to get him moving but this is easier said than done, given the fact that there has been a slight worsening of the MS spasticity and spasms in his legs, so one problem is fighting against the other.  Despite this he is in good spirits and his sense of humour is very much intact!

Dave's mum returned home today, poor gal needs the rest but she will return on Tuesday evening.  Her presence here was much appreciated and  as a result we were able to sort out plants that needed potting on in the garden, we couldn't let all of Dave's hard earned effort go to waste.  We have also kept ourselves busy with the usual household tasks as well reading, crafting and playing card games.  When mum left this afternoon we attempted a jaunt to the seaside but it was heaving with people and ultimately not safe, despite this we enjoyed our Sunday drive and it was good to escape the four walls of home.  When we returned Pip set too and made a yummy batch of muffins, Ben finished sorting the tea and I had a much needed lie down on the sofa.  All things considered we are doing quite well in these strange times :-)

  Thank you for your kind thoughts and prayers x

 Dave took this photo the day before his accident, the plants are now out of their pots and in the raised bed.

 The calm before the storm, a mug of tea, a to-do list and a bit o' quiet!  I treated Mum and I to a new mug, I love puffins hence this one and Mum chose a really lovely peacock - I reckon we have drunk gallons of tea this week!!

 Sharing a breakfast joke with Nanna and Wilbur :-)

 I let Pip loose with my camera!

Sunday Baking

We will drop off a muffin along with some other goodies to the hospital tomorrow.  We are not allowed to visit so I will leave a named bag at reception and the ward will collect the items when they have time.

Hospital Again

Only this time it is Dave's turn!  He fell really badly on Monday morning and by Tuesday evening was transferred to hospital.  It looks like he has damaged his coccyx and is currently unable to stand  - there are times when even the liquid morphine doesn't touch the pain.  In addition the damage has also exacerbated the MS spasms in his legs so the consultant has prescribed Baclofen which is an anti spasmodic to counteract this.  The physios are going to try and get him moving today but working passed a horrendous pain barrier is going to be tricky.  In short he won't be home until he can stand safely and that is anybody's guess at this stage.

Dave's Mum returned home on Monday after having spent the weekend with us and then promptly returned on Tuesday evening when everything went pear shaped!!  Her presence is much appreciated as both kids are finding it really difficult right now.  I too have a steep learning curve dealing with all the online banking and even working out how to download photos from my camera, edit in Picasa and then transfer onto the blog, but I did it and so here is a photo from the weekend when all was relatively serene at this end:

All Good

MaryGrace has made a really good recovery and has been discharged from the burns unit for the time being.  Kath has all the necessary items to maintain the healing process and apart from an upcoming Physio session on Monday, there are no further visits to Manchester for the time being.

As with the end of every home school year we have limped along to the finish line but have managed to keep things going despite the craziness of a pandemic and the usual life hassles at this end.  In between the desk work both kids have been involved in practical projects and have gained a lot of new knowledge and extra skills in the process.

Making a clay pot from the Stone Age history book

The clay dried quicker than expected and the end result was not as good as hoped for!

Earthworks Mad Science Zoom Session

  

Ben enlarging the letter box in preparation for the new one

 It was hard work cutting through the pvc door.

 Not too bad end result!

Filling the raised bed