Friday, 20 July 2012

How Much More

I posted the following  on my page over on this site:

Rest Ministries Sun Room

I've really been struggling today with that familiar black cloud that descends all too frequently. The continuous grey weather does not help, it dampens one's spirits and aggravates the pain.

Then of course there is the fact that once again I'm working the night shift attempting to stabilise a diabetic condition that truly has a mind of its own. The nine year old boy (where did the time go?) who is the bearer of such a condition is blissfully unaware of the night time trials and tribulations as he snores peacefully in his bed.

On and off throughout the course of today I have truly wondered "Where is God?" and "Does He truly care?" My prayer life has hit an all time low and there are many days when I fail to acknowledge His presence, so it is little wonder that the spiritual well is dry! However, God is good and as a result of something which happened only five minutes ago, He made himself known to me in a very tangible way.

Pip our youngest woke with a bad dream and I quickly made my way to her room to re-settle her, as I sat by her bed pondering my negative thoughts a "voice" inside my head reminded me of this passage of scripture from Isaiah:

Can a mother forget her nursing child? Can she feel no love for the child she has borne? But even if that were possible, I would not forget you! See, I have written your name on the palms of my hands

Thank you God for those loving and encouraging words at a time when I needed them most.

With Love San x


  1. Oh, San, I know how this feels, so alone and asking why! What a lovely experience, though. We have a little sign over our house altar, that reads "I am always in your heart, strengthening you." (Catherine of Siena) Sometimes we just forget.

  2. (hugs) Sweet mama, life can be so overwhelming and distracting we forget that the source of our strength is a well that never runs dry. When you reach the end of all you have, He's there, holding on to you.

    In my horrible long sleepless week, I've found myself pulling out my birthing scriptures!

  3. Thank you so much for your beautiful and loving words and for reminding me that i am never alone. As the footsteps poem on my wall reminds me in the times of trial when there are only one set of footprints that is when He carries me.

    San x

  4. I think you do an amazing job. You are a lovely mama and a carer and you are not well yourself. You are the glue that holds it all together. If I am ever ill it all falls apart but you hold it all together, day after day after day.

  5. love you san. thank you for sharing the light that shines through your darkest moments. it strengthens us all.

  6. Thinking of you, the good times always outweigh the bad. Do you have a book from Sarah young, Jesus calling? It gives you a message everyday, and it keeps me going, it may help. Sending peace, love and hugs xxxx


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